I always swore to myself that my posts, and emails, etc... wouldn't be an obsessive amount of ramblings about my pregnancy. I was never the the type of person to "count the days", or really cherish many little sentimental moments of any kind. Some may see this as a sickness, I wouldn't know what to call it... I simply don't get very sentimental-- about anything!
But today, I woke up in a hormonal stew, and sat pouting on my sofa. The perfect time for me to open my journal and try to complain. As I began to write, the Lord really began to weigh in some reality on my heart. So, today I KNOW that God is so good, and to NOT share this pregnancy story with you would be a "cryin'" shame! (ACK!!)
So- for probably the ONLY time- I will share my journal in public, here is today's entry (with computer spell check and edits of course :) :
January 20th, 2012
"On December 1st, I found out I was pregnant. My family cried and screamed with glee, as I masked a smile and waded through the puddle of mixed emotions. Whether or not I wanted this pregnancy, it was now officially mine.
On January 3rd I conquered on of my many pregnancy fears: the doctor visit. Hearing the baby's heartbeat was supposed to make it feel more real, and for a split second, my heart did jump. But the most REAL feeling for me was the constant hunger, the incessant nausea, and my already changing figure. My energy level was non-existant, and my productivity was gone. I would've been pleased if I had at least known my brain was sharp and active, but everyday it became apparent that even it had lost it's edge.
So this is what babies do? They bring joy to everyone around you, while you're perpetually making rushed visits to the bathroom!
On January 9th was my ultrasound. I brought home 3 little pictures of what was very clearly a baby. I was 11 1/2 weeks. This dose of news brought some fresh air to my lungs. 3 months, 4 pounds gained, 61 days of nausea had already passed. I was nearing the end of the first trimester. BUT...
The due date: JULY 31ST
As I sucked down the ketchup, rationalizing how fries really were the healthy choice, I was internally raving. GOD MUST BE DETERMINED TO TAKE AWAY MY BIRTHDAY! For 24 years I have shared a birthday with my sister Hannah, and now doctors are trying to tell me that I will be sharing it with a third person.
So this is what babies do?! I never intended to become completely selfless!
A couple weeks have gone by, and now that the nausea seems to visit less frequently, and my hunger has become a controllable habit, I can sit down and think. Thinking however is forced to come by Spirit alone, because by brain has left me.
Is my due date really intended by God as a cruel joke? Or is God saying 'This is my gift to you.' ? What my silly self has been pouting over isn't the child, but the pregnancy.
In a few short months, motherhood is going to slap me in my already tired face. And God is going to place in my arms, the miracle of a child. One HE formed in MY womb. One HE chose even before I was aware. This isn't just a baby, but he/she is a child of God. And for some insane reason God saw me, a mess of a girl, consumed with her body and her brains, and He saw me as the perfect mother for HIS child.
What do babies do then?
They awaken your eyes to your desperate need for Christ. Before they're even born they force you to die to yourself.
And they bring you the greatest gift of all: A clear example of God's grace and love. God who sees you for who you REALLY ARE and not how you simply APPEAR.
Now, I don't know how this will change my attitude as my bathroom visits increase, but I know now that July 31st, 2012 (without or without the baby's birth) will be the best birthday ever."
Friday, January 20, 2012
Friday, January 13, 2012
Painting from Life
My husband got the itch the other day, to move out of his studio and find a place to paint outdoors. It's been a cold week, so of course I let him go alone.
About 5 minutes from the house is an old farm house which sit next door to some train tracks. It's a beautiful piece of property. One I have always enjoyed driving by. This is where Jonathan set up his mini-out-of-car-studio.
I was so happy he documented this time with photos. He doesn't do this often enough. But it is so fun to see the real process of art, and to know from WHERE each painting actually came.
Here's the artist's messy mobile studio. With his bottomless coffee mug. The man has become addicted to coffee! This is no thanks to my father who eagerly eggs it on with new brands and forms of brewing.
Coffee snobs *cough* *cough*
Here it is!!! Nearly finished, minus the artists' signature.
Now, you know where it came from. It's the real deal. It captures the essence of the place where he stood, in the way only paint can.
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Catching up from a LONG silence
Forgive the long intermission from posts, without many complaints spoken today let me just say Google and domain names shouldn't go together. Needless to say after much "sweat and tears" I am happy to at least be back online as www.jonathanhowefineart.blogspot.com.
MANY things have happened during the course of these last 2 months. Things I would have shared with you, my friends if I could have.
Firstly, Jonathan and I are now going to be parents! Boy or girl we do not know yet, the baby is officially 12 weeks. It was a surprise to us, but we are very excited that the Lord has seen fit to add to the Howe household. And now what an adventure it will be to raise a FAMILY in an artistic atmosphere.
We're running the list of names, debating over which ones have the most powerful meanings behind them. Decisions have yet to be made if it's a boy, but if it's a girl the verdict has almost been reached.
We have had a couple shows since my last post. Artscalamation 2011 and Knoxville Unites 11.11.11
Both went which wonderfully!
At Artsclamation, Jonathan was voted "Featured Artist" for next year, the vote was unanimous, or so we were told, so his art will be featured on all their advertising and he will have twice the booth space as other artists there. God's favor was abundant on that show, this was obvious to us and to the others watching.
Knoxville Unites was our first self-hosted fundraiser event. All for the benefit of Angelic Ministries , a wonderful non-profit, ministry devoted to restoring the lives of families here in Tennessee. We were blessed to have so many people come out and support this cause. And raised generous funds to begin to chip away at the cost of renovating their building used to feed and minister to those in need.
All this before the end of 2011. And now, a new year has begun. What the Lord holds for 2012 I don't know, but I am excited to see.
Hope all had a wonderful Christmas and a Happy New Year!
MANY things have happened during the course of these last 2 months. Things I would have shared with you, my friends if I could have.
Firstly, Jonathan and I are now going to be parents! Boy or girl we do not know yet, the baby is officially 12 weeks. It was a surprise to us, but we are very excited that the Lord has seen fit to add to the Howe household. And now what an adventure it will be to raise a FAMILY in an artistic atmosphere.
We're running the list of names, debating over which ones have the most powerful meanings behind them. Decisions have yet to be made if it's a boy, but if it's a girl the verdict has almost been reached.
We have had a couple shows since my last post. Artscalamation 2011 and Knoxville Unites 11.11.11
Both went which wonderfully!
At Artsclamation, Jonathan was voted "Featured Artist" for next year, the vote was unanimous, or so we were told, so his art will be featured on all their advertising and he will have twice the booth space as other artists there. God's favor was abundant on that show, this was obvious to us and to the others watching.
Knoxville Unites was our first self-hosted fundraiser event. All for the benefit of Angelic Ministries , a wonderful non-profit, ministry devoted to restoring the lives of families here in Tennessee. We were blessed to have so many people come out and support this cause. And raised generous funds to begin to chip away at the cost of renovating their building used to feed and minister to those in need.
All this before the end of 2011. And now, a new year has begun. What the Lord holds for 2012 I don't know, but I am excited to see.
Hope all had a wonderful Christmas and a Happy New Year!
Monday, November 7, 2011
A Shoe Redo
Now, I just LOVE my puppy Amber, my 7 pound, little, cuddly, Maltipoo. However, on days like the one last week, after finding she had chewed the bow off of my only brown flats, I was NOT happy! BUT, the results of my Shoe Redo, I am VERY happy with.
Here's my Shoe Redo Story:
Here's my Shoe Redo Story:
This was a skirt I had laying around, LOVED the fabric, but it unfortunately didn't fit. So, I used it for my shoes!
My poor, poor little chewed up shoe.
So, I made some flowers, and patches to cover the flaws on my shoes and attached them with fabric glue. And here are the final results:
The front
The back
Took an hour of my time, and no out of pocket cost for a "new" pair of cute, trendy shoes!
Thursday, October 20, 2011
The Water
There's something about the water that immediately causes a tired soul to rest. Something about the rhythm of the waves, the light that reflects off the water, it is always moving, and yet so still.
Something about the silence, the murmuring of the trees, and the gentle lapse of the water against the shore.
At this very moment, it is providing a life source to plants, animals, people, and yet, you think that it is all your own, that this moment was meant for you and you only.
And it is all your own.
It is your silence, your spot of tranquility, your escape. This is your water.
Your time to remove yourself from a modern age, and go back to the simple pleasures of being... you... nothing more... nothing less.
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Knoxville Unites
It's on!!! Jonathan and I were sitting at the dining room table the last week of September, and after having thought about Angelic Ministries for a while, suddenly had the revelation to use OUR gifts for their good. Wouldn't you know that within a week the idea was approved by the gallery space, had a local television network wanting to air the event, and radio stations ready to give air time to announce it!
ONE WEEK, and the design for the campaign was finished, the major details were complete, and Angelic Ministries was elated to hear that God was answering their prayers for a fundraiser in a very specific way.
In less than a month invitations are ordered, posters are ordered, sponsors who believe in the event have given of their resources, and Knoxville Unites 11.11.11 is developing a permanent website to be complete in merely DAYS!!!
These kinds of events are usually labored over for 6+months... But hey!!! If God can create the entire world in 6 days, then he can make this event shine in short moments. God has been so good, and now were seeing the vision for this event, turn into a long term ministry in Knoxville.
One that fuels and supports unity in Knoxville, that pulls the community together to see needs met, and keeps this economy relationally driven and thriving.
So, save the date! 11.11.11 from 6:30-9:30pm and the Emporium Center in Downtown Knoxville. We're going to have music, food, a silent auction, and more, all to benefit the wonderful work that Angelic Ministries does.
See you soon!
Monday, September 26, 2011
Angelic Ministries (shared from "A Season of Harvest")
I read this blog a couple days ago, and it moved me to empty my house of all the unnecessary clutter that I keep
"to use someday", and give it to the people who surround me who truly do need it!
A Season of Harvest by Sheila Atchley is a stunning blog of thoughtful wisdom. I hope that you will read this post!
A Season of Harvest: Ministry That Mends - Angelic Ministries of Knoxvi...: It started out a rainy, dreary Wednesday today. I awoke to a crick in my neck, and a steady drizzle outside my window, and got my day starte...
"to use someday", and give it to the people who surround me who truly do need it!
A Season of Harvest by Sheila Atchley is a stunning blog of thoughtful wisdom. I hope that you will read this post!
A Season of Harvest: Ministry That Mends - Angelic Ministries of Knoxvi...: It started out a rainy, dreary Wednesday today. I awoke to a crick in my neck, and a steady drizzle outside my window, and got my day starte...
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Jonathan Howe
A short message from my husband Jonathan Howe, regarding his new painting:
"One Step Away" - 24x30" - Oil on Canvas. I grew up with a beautiful creek running through our back yard. My summers were spent in that creek. A creek provides infinite fun for the imaginative child. My brother and I would catch snapping turtles and crawdads, build dams and bridges and hide in waiting as in a cool wet dugout for imaginary nazi soldiers to fall into our trap. While this new painting depicts a somewhat more picturesque mountain stream in the Smokies, it brings back memories of my childhood backyard escape.
"One Step Away" - 24x30" - Oil on Canvas. I grew up with a beautiful creek running through our back yard. My summers were spent in that creek. A creek provides infinite fun for the imaginative child. My brother and I would catch snapping turtles and crawdads, build dams and bridges and hide in waiting as in a cool wet dugout for imaginary nazi soldiers to fall into our trap. While this new painting depicts a somewhat more picturesque mountain stream in the Smokies, it brings back memories of my childhood backyard escape.
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Photography Day Trip
Hello friends,
It's been a busy life in the Howe home, running around, hosting "Fashion Extravaganza" parties for teenage girls, taking the boys on hikes, a couple shows, just a multitude of things which can consume your time and mental space, pulling it away from my social life online. But life is good, God is good, and I am thankful!
The weather is cooling down, it's almost fall. I have been looking back at this year, and so far, have very little to complain about... And yet... foolish me, it seems I have complained too much. It is unfortunate that this world always has your flesh crying out for more... And you neglect to see the beautiful things God has blessed you with.
This is why I am falling in love with photography, it forces you to seek the beautiful things WHERE you are at.... And if you aren't surrounded by something beautiful, it makes you go somewhere else to find it. You see the world, your home, the meal you just made, or the "everyday item" in a totally new light.
I love learning the "art" of capturing the beauty in EVERYTHING
*Linking with Thursday's blog hop at Bassgiraffe's blog. Side bar button will lead you there
It's been a busy life in the Howe home, running around, hosting "Fashion Extravaganza" parties for teenage girls, taking the boys on hikes, a couple shows, just a multitude of things which can consume your time and mental space, pulling it away from my social life online. But life is good, God is good, and I am thankful!
The weather is cooling down, it's almost fall. I have been looking back at this year, and so far, have very little to complain about... And yet... foolish me, it seems I have complained too much. It is unfortunate that this world always has your flesh crying out for more... And you neglect to see the beautiful things God has blessed you with.
This is why I am falling in love with photography, it forces you to seek the beautiful things WHERE you are at.... And if you aren't surrounded by something beautiful, it makes you go somewhere else to find it. You see the world, your home, the meal you just made, or the "everyday item" in a totally new light.
I love learning the "art" of capturing the beauty in EVERYTHING
*Linking with Thursday's blog hop at Bassgiraffe's blog. Side bar button will lead you there
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Patagonia
Patagonia is a region located in Argentina and Chile, integrating the southernmost section of the Andes mountains to the southwest towards the Pacific ocean and from the east of the cordillera to the valleys it follows south through Colorado River towards Carmen de Patagones in the Atlantic Ocean. To the west, it includes the territory of Valdivia through Tierra del Fuego archipelago.
I myself have never been. But, my husband and I had the blessed opportunity to meet a young couple who have been there many times, and love it! The young man (our age) is an international photographer, and leads photography trips around the world. In fact, I envy the opportunities he gives people, such as a up coming trip to Alaska, in which he will be teaching aspiring photographers how to photograph the Alaskan Grizzly Bears (scary and utterly exciting!).
This newly wed couple is loaded with enthusiasm, stuffed with adventure, and simply glowing with a love for God. Their heart, and their talent is truly hard to match! In fact, I encourage all of you to visit his website sometime!
www.Paulhassell.com
They recently got married, and as a wedding gift, they had a painting commissioned by Jonathan, one of wild horses running out in the open field in Patagonia. An image that is dear to both their hearts for many reasons.
This painting was such fun for Jonathan, because it was deep... Deep in meaning, deep with natural beauty, and deep in the hearts of two wonderful people.
It's is so cool to watch Jonathan's gift be a simple reflection of the nature of God in action. What starts as a love within the heart, becomes created in a beautiful reality.
Time brings forth the details and the beauty.
We believe the two horses in the lead are a beautiful depiction of the couple, leading people forth into the beautiful freedom of Christ!
Here it is! The finished product! And when you look at it, you're led to say, "Isn't God a beautiful creator?!" God's glory is clearly seen in Patagonia!
Blessings!
Monday, July 4, 2011
One Lovely Blog Award
This is the first time I have been able to celebrate a blogging award! Thank you very much to Hannah Mcconnell at "Daughter By Design" who was so sweet and shared it with me. For my friends who aren't familiar with her blog, please stop by and visit! Her stunning creativity, and home/infant designs are GORGEOUS to say the least.
The privilege of this award comes with some criteria which I am pleased to do.First, seven things you may not know about me:
1. I grew up most my life a full on tom-boy. Many thanks to my mother and sister who dedicated much of their time to refining the lady in me before hubby and I met!
2. I am left-handed (I suppose this means I am either special, crazy, or both)! However, my identical twin sister is right handed.
3. I have had the privilege of traveling to Cambodia a couple times, Thailand, Vietnam, Laos, and Honduras a few times also. I love the Nations and desire to see God exalted by every tribe and tongue. But I do however, have a particular LOVE for my family in Cambodia, my brothers and sisters in Christ and the Heritage House Children there.
4. I am one of 5 musicians in our family of 6. I have been playing guitar for going on 13+ years along with my father and brother.
5. I love the outdoors, I'd would usually much rather be out in the heat playing hard, than sitting in the air conditioning.
6. Hmmm.... running out of details!! My favorite food is Chili.
7. And I have learned that I love to cook, though, growing up I can remember spending time in the kitchen very seldom.
Ok! Step 1 now finished, I get to share this award with other bloggers I know and love!
Constant in Chaos- Catherine is a real inspiration to me, her life is a beautiful image of honesty and encouragement.
Funky Junk Interiors- Donna is full of fun, thrilling, affordable ideas!
A Room For Everyone- A gorgeous home, just reading the blog title makes you feel cozy!
Studio JRU- Jennifer, who is a lovely artists also seeking to glorify God with her creativity. I LOVE meeting people with the same heart. Her work is beautiful too!
And last but not least: Blushing Rose- Marydon owns an antique store, and has a lovely blog reflecting her store, and her walk with God. Beyond her blog, I have enjoyed her friendship and support of my blogging journey for as far back as I can remember starting it!
Thanks again Hannah! And Happy 4th of July to all. May we remember how blessed we are.
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